“There are some nights when
sleep plays coy,
aloof and disdainful.
And all the wiles
that I employ to win
its service to my side
are useless as wounded pride,
and much more painful.” Maya Angelou

I have an unofficial diagnosis of my sleep issues: insomnia and possibly two sleep disorders. Any one of which explains why I don’t sleep well.

Treatment: Sleep study at the sleep clinic,  overnight July 13th fully monitored.  Diagnosed and interpreted on July 27th and an appointment with a Sleep Psychologist at the end of August.

Until then I’m on my own. Some nights I sleep. Most nights I don’t, much. I had an excellent meeting on June 6th with the Department head of the Sleep Clinic. She knew my language. She’d spoken with 100’s, maybe thousands like me. And she knew exactly how to proceed.

My hope and prayer is that the methods that have worked for so many,  work for me. I use to find the night intriguing, mysterious… now it’s just a cage for which I have no key. Now I live with the hope that someday sleep will not be so elusive, but once again a dear friend who visits regularly.

I can wait for my appointments, knowing that the end is in sight. I’m no longer alone in my fight.  Good night. Someday I will be able to say that with more meaning.  Someday soon, I hope!

About the author - a member of the My Disability Matters Community: Libby Baker Sweiger

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