I have always heard that I am always so smiley and positive. Of course, this is very nice to hear and I always answer, well I like people and even chatting with people I don’t really know always makes enjoy myself. Like when I go to the pharmacy in my village there are two women working there who I always have to have a little chat with simply because we find the good tone between us. Much of the conversation is about the aspects of life, something that perhaps is natural at a pharmacy. Yesterday I heard the normal phrase about me being so smiley and positive. It is always nice to hear this, but at the same time, I find myself thinking.. yes but you should have seen me when I am full of despair over my own situation.. it annoys me that this thought always pops into my head disturbing my happiness overhearing I am always smiley and positive. Maybe I don’t really believe they mean it? I want to be the one making the most of life. I mean what choice is there? I want my life lived my way the way I want to live it, not the way people feel I should live because of my disability. There have been times, for example after surgeries when this has just been down to the level of having chocolate with my coffee, but such small things have helped me through a sometimes tough recovery road. Make the most of life is always possible if you just recognise the situation you are in.
My mother just lost a good friend. This friend knew she was going to die very soon but had come to terms with it, and my mother says they could even joke about it something that really makes perspective to life, My mum is very grateful for the moments she spent with her friend who needed someone who also was crazy enough to enjoy life even when the situation was as it was. Make the most of life.
The woman at the pharmacy was not stopping at the normal phrases to me this day, she went further and says she gets so emotionally touched every time she sees me and says I inspire her. and she meant it because the woman was literally crying. I got a little bit confused about this reaction and I find myself thanking her, then instead of giving her a hug I find myself babbling a lot about making the most of life. I think she needed encouragement and to be an inspiration for other people makes me think I am no hero. but I should allow people to be inspired by me trying to make the most of life. because there are people I know who also inspire me. My skype friend from China is a woman who really inspires me. Jing has also cerebral palsy, and in China disabled have no rights to education nor support. She is truly a woman making the most of life. On her own, with help and support from her parents, she got an education and is now working full time as a translator. I hope one day I will be able to meet her.
At the pharmacy, the woman also says Marit you are brave. I never got round to ask what she meant because another customer needed her. I am thinking perhaps I am brave because it takes guts to make the most of life? I don’t know. I am who I am, living my life how I find works for me